When Twitter Writes Your Post For You

Remember that time I completely blanked on something to blog about so I turned to Twitter? No? Well, ok, so it happened today and I'm guessing it has something to do with a little too much frolicking and Miller Lite last night. You know I tend to make bad decisions on Tuesday nights... I blame the food trucks, obviously. Tuesday nights are just meant for fun. Or maybe they're not, but if you ask my friends and I, they totally are.

And maybe we're a little different but that's just how I like it.

So, back to the Twitter thing, now that I've gotten the obligatory photo-in-my-post thing out of the way...

Here's what I asked.
And here's what I got.

@WhitneyEllen how to lose a guy in 10 days!
— Sarah Webb (@iamsarahwebb) July 17, 2013

Well Sarah, I assume it goes a little something like this:

1. Be a clinger and don't ever leave him alone.
2. Talk about your ex a lot.
3. Don't let him touch you or kiss you.
4. Get blacked out drunk and puke all over his shoes.
5. Tell his friends you're his girlfriend.
6. Insist you two go on "date night" on Friday when he wants to go play darts with his boys.
7. Tell him you love him on day 9.
8. Talk about feelings and emotions nonstop.
9. Show up at his local hangout uninvited.
10. If all else fails, hit on his friends.

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@WhitneyEllen pizza rolls vs bagel bites! Whoop whoop! 😉
— Kayla @ lovelucygirl (@lovelucygirlxo) July 17, 2013

This one's easy. When pizza's on a bagel, you can eat pizza anytime.
Bagel Bites win. Always. Toss some Chardonnay back with them and you've got yourself a damn feast fit for a queen.
And now I know what I'm having for dinner tonight. Score.

Side note: SEE GUYS, I NEEDED this picture from months ago in my camera roll! 

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@whitneyellen 99 problems and whether or not a bitch is or is not one.
— Lindsey B (@FollowtheRuels) July 17, 2013

I've certainly got problems, but I'm not sure 99 is really an accurate number. However, currently, a bitch is not one of my problems. Mostly because I tend to stay away from bitches. Ain't nobody got time for them bitches, ya heard?

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I mean, this one is pretty easy. Have you read my bestie's blog? She's the friggen kitty cat's pajamas and obviously she sets the bar for said name very high. My Erin standards are very high and, well, you have my bestie to blame for that.

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And that's going to do it for today's worst blog post ever in life.

Sorry about this, hope you didn't waste too much of your time here today.

I need a cheeseburger.

And more red Gatorade.

Over and out.