Poof! Be gone.

If you're new here, or never read (like, ever), you may be unaware that I am single. Being single is actually something I've been enjoying for the first time in my life, as opposed to searching for my next future ex-boyfriend every night I go out. Alas, finally, I'm getting the hang of this single thing and it's definitely fun for me at this point.

One of the down sides to the single thing is creepers, as I've admitted in the past. For me, I think I come across them more often because I go out pretty often and seemingly the creepers are always out and on the prowl. Also, I don't think many, if any, of these creepers actually care whether you're entirely single or have a ring on your finger. You know, just for the record.

Low and behold, you don't even have to go out and be social to come across said creepers. Come to find out they can find you anywhere, like Facebook chat for instance.

Guys, real life, this happened last week. I went to high school with this idiot and haven't seen or heard from him in a solid 5 years, at the very least. 

What inda actual FUQ?

Sure dude, 2:30 am? Definitely come get me in that new car of yours. Because that's exactly what gets me interested, your new car. Oh wait, no, never mind. Not happening, bro. Be gone.

Of course now, in typical fashion, all of my whitty comebacks are starting to surface and I can't help but to at least write them somewhere. Where better than here, obviously? 

Instead of ignoring sir creeps-a-lot like I did, here's some things I should have done:

Solid and to the point -

Shame the game - 

Pull the sleeper on him -

Play the blonde card - 

And if all of those failed, I should have just thrown NeNe Leakes on his ass - 

I don't doubt this will be my last creep encounter, so now that I've got myself a few notes stored away, stay tuned.

I'm off to dodge the creepers and get this Tuesday show on the road.
Here's to hoping it goes faster than yesterday.

*insert NeNe gif from above here*