the french have a word for that

ALL THE GOOD PARTS GONE FOR LEGAL REASONS

I am walking through the basement
of an all womens' college dorm,
carrying my underwear, photos of a
duck & dolphin, and a sheet labeled
LITERATURE FOR ANDY. Here it's
midnight. Today I ate my share of
thunderstorms and hickory potatoes.
"Can I talk?" asked a 12 year old.
I said "Only if it's interesting"
and he said "By whose standards?"
Would you still love me if I were
awarded Most Likely to Applaud Too
Emotionally? You can have two
desserts, I don't care. I feel
______ because a 12 year old said
"If a poem has audience participation,
you should." We have to hire mollusks,
zombie Kenneth Kochs and @ signs to mop
up with whipped cream and cheese malice.
Go away if you're not happy. This is
Rule #1. Fun fact: I am very real,
and I have certain secrets of
cinnamon and ambulance and moss.
Now I am going to take a shower.